Recently, I began to notice that people around me sometimes do not understand what and why they live. And most often I hear the question — there is no point in life, what to do? Without thinking twice, it was decided to write this article.
Where does the feeling that the meaning of life is lost come from?
“There is no meaning in life, what to do?”No matter how frightening this phrase is, absolutely every person lives in a similar state. After all, the understanding of one’s finiteness, the realization that life is one and death will necessarily be its completion, prompts thoughts about one’s purpose and the purpose of existence. But sometimes it happens that because of the troubles in life, a person loses the meaning that guided him before, or is disappointed in him. And then he simply does not know how to live on.
But there is even a name for such a state — an existential vacuum.
Usually such searches are more acute in those who are too often undermined by difficulties. Then he seems to be looking for justifications for his suffering, because it is important to understand that living through difficulties and sorrows is not just like that, but is of global importance. But for those who are busy with earthly interests and daily tasks, this question does not arise so sharply. And at the same time, those who have already achieved the main goal, the necessary benefits, begin to look for a new meaning, thinking about the high.
Viktor Frankl also spoke about what to understand, what is the meaning of life, a person must independently, listening to himself. No one else can answer for him. And today, dear reader, we will try to consider the ways by which we can develop awareness and get closer to the answer that is important for us.
Mindfulness and Finding Your Purpose
We have already said that such searches are individual and no one else can answer questions about how to find the value of your own life for you. Therefore, these exercises require silence and a space where no one can interfere. Turn off your phone and ask your loved ones not to disturb you. Try to be open and honest with yourself.
A. Five Steps to Understanding Your Life
1. Bîranîn
Close your eyes and try to remember significant events in your life. It is necessary, as it were, to look back and consider the path of your life starting from childhood. Let the images come to mind, no need to stop yourself or try to «right». Start with the phrase:- «I was born here» and continue each event with the words:- «and then», «and then». At the very end, move to the present moment of your life.
And when you feel that enough is enough, write down the events that have surfaced in your memory. And it doesn’t matter if these pictures were pleasant before your eyes, or not very much — this is your life, the reality that you met, and which left a certain imprint on you and your formation as a person. All these notes later will help to realize your attitude to any situations, and to understand what you want to repeat, and what to avoid and not allow in the future.
Thus, you will take responsibility for your own life and its quality in your own hands. You will understand where it is important to move on.
2.Circumstances
The next step is to continue the first exercise, only this time it will be necessary to remember the circumstances that brought you joy and satisfaction. Where you were yourself and did what you liked. Even if at that moment you were two years old, write down this event anyway. Thanks to this step, you will remember long-forgotten significant cases, with the help of which it is quite possible to open internal resources.
And even if now it is empty inside and there is a feeling of aimlessness of life, this part of the exercise will help to remind you that the experience of satisfaction is still present. And if it was good, it is quite possible to live positive emotions again. When pleasant images do not arise, and this also happens, it is important not to lose heart, because the absence of positive events will be an incentive to finally change something in life. It is very important to find motivation, something that will push you to move forward. Try everything, even something that seems uninteresting to you, for example: yoga, fitness, etc. The hardest thing is to overcome not the desire to change something in your life, do not be afraid to change!
Understand what you want, set a goal and achieve it. Self-development and move where you dreamed and wanted. To learn how to set goals, you can read a previously published article. Here is the link: «How to set goals correctly to achieve success in any area.»
3.Balanî
The next time you find the right time, try to think of times when you felt calm and relaxed. Remembering such situations, you will understand what needs to be done for internal balance. And this will help bring more value to your life in the present and even help you make a choice in which direction to move.
4.Ezmûn
The fourth step is very difficult and there can be a lot of resistance to doing it. Give yourself time, and when you’re ready, think back to painful times where you lost your balance or lived through fear. After all, all the situations that happen to us, even if we don’t like it, carry a tremendous experience. We seem to have a library of our lives inside, and we are constantly writing books: “Me and my parents”, “I am in a relationship”, “Loss of a loved one”…
And when, for example, we lived through some kind of gap, then in the future we get a book about relationships and look for a topic about that, but how was it last time? What did I do to make it easier? Did it help? And so on. In addition, this task will help to get rid of the pain a little, if you give yourself the opportunity to realize it, feel it and let it go.
5.Evîn
And the last step is to remember the circumstances of life related to love. And it doesn’t matter if it was successful or not, the main thing is that it was. Love for parents, friends, a dog, or even some place and object. No matter how empty life may seem to you, there were always moments of warmth, tenderness and a desire to take care of it. And it will also be a resource for you.
You can get relief and joy if you improve not only the quality of your life, but also those of your loved ones. It adds more value to every day you live.
After you have done this tremendous job of becoming aware of yourself and your life path, it’s time to move on to the next task.
B. «how to find your purpose»
First, prepare a sheet of paper and make sure that no one and nothing can distract you. Then start writing whatever comes to mind when you ask yourself: – «What is my meaning of life?». Human psychology is such that you will begin to analyze each of your written points, find fault with it or devalue it. No need, let me just write down all the answers that spontaneously come to mind. Even if they seem stupid.
At some point, you will feel that you have stumbled upon something important. You may burst into tears, or feel a chill down your spine, trembling in your hands, or an unexpected surge of joy. This will be the correct answer. Be prepared for the fact that the search process is also very individual, it can take half an hour for one person, and several days for another.
Q. “What would you like to happen in this world thanks to you?”
Listen carefully to your heart, which option it will respond to. If it doesn’t work, you can change the wording a little.
We have been asked since childhood: «Who do you want to become?», and we are used to answering it, sometimes to please our parents. But this formulation brings back to yourself, to your needs and the world as a whole.
D. Three Years Exercise
Sit comfortably, inhale and exhale slowly. Feel every part of your body, are you comfortable? Then consider that you have three years left to live. Try not to succumb to fear and go into fantasies of death. Decide how you want to spend the rest of your time by answering sincerely:
- Where would you like to live these three years?
- With whom exactly?
- What would you like to do, work or study? What to do?
After the imagination builds a clear picture, try to compare it with the current life. What are the differences and similarities? What is stopping you from achieving your dreams? You will be able to understand what exactly is missing in the current existence, and what needs are not met. And consequently, dissatisfaction arises, which leads to the search for one’s destiny.
Xelasî
I also wanted to recommend that you check out my list of films that will help you get started. Here is the link: “TOP 6 films that motivate you to start moving towards your goal”
That’s all, dear readers. Follow your desires, take care of your loved ones, develop and satisfy your needs — then the question of your existence will not be so acute and you will feel the fullness of life. See you again.